Those next 2 months were tough. I mean really tough. I had to be incredibly focused and disciplined - not something I was used to. What's more, my day job suddenly become incredibly full on and intense. And so my life suddenly consisted of getting up early in the morning to grab an hour or so to work on the Guide, off to work for a 10 hour work day which often didn't lend time for lunch. Straight home and onto the laptop to get on with the Guide until about midnight when I'd collapse into bed and set the alarm to 7am and the cycle would repeat itself. Needless to say, coffee became my staple diet.
On top of that, the creative process of writing dragged up all manner of anxieties. This had to be good. I was writing a book for heavens sake. This wasn't just a blog entry that could get happily swallowed up on the website. My talents (or lack of, as I sometimes feared) were on display. I felt incredibly exposed and the pressure of responsiblity of having to make this good sometimes got the better of me.
There were certainly a few occasions where I thought I was slightly losing it and on more than one occasion my boyfriend at the time had to scrape me off the ground as I sobbed in a total state of exhaustion and overwhelm. To be honest, those days are rather hazy, but despite the occasional melt-down I do rememeber a real sense of purpose and confidence propelling me forward.
I also remember in the middle of it all, one week that felt like an oasis in the midst of a serious desert of hard graft. I had taken a week off work to get a large part of the Guide finished and that week gave me a glimpse of what life would be like if I worked from home, as my own boss, in a role that I loved.
Every morning I'd wake up excited looking forward to the day ahead. I was at my desk every day by 9am tucked away in a colourful and cosy corner in my room. I was surrounded by papers with ideas scribbled down in felt tip pens, doodles and diagrams. Horrifying chaos to some people - absolute bliss to me. I could work lying on the floor, cover my wall with images and diagrams and words as I figured out structure and content in my own way. I could wear the clothes that I wanted to wear, listen to music. If I felt bored or uninspired there was nothing to stop me from going out for an hour for a cycle or to browse my local charity shop so that I could come back feeling refreshed and ready to go again. On one of the days I had a friend round for lunch and we lay in the sun all afternoon and chatted and I made up on missed hours by working later into the evening that day.
This is what I wanted my career to be like. I loved it. It didn't feel like work at all.
But that blissful week was short lived and it was soon back to squeezing my Careershifters work into evenings and weekends along with the rest of the Careershifters team who were all proof reading, writing sections, editing and designing the Guide on top of their own demanding day jobs.
But finally we did it. We had created the Careershifters Guide and, for a week, I had got to taste my dream career and lifestyle...and I wanted more.
How was I going to make it happen? Funnily enough, it was a chapter in the very Careershifters Guide I had just written that showed me the way...
Then the brand new Careershifters Guide is designed for you.
Selina is a full time career change coach, Co-founder & Content Director of Careershifters and author of the Careershifters Guide. She is passionate about helping people find a career that they love. You can read her own inspiring careershift story here. To find out more about the personal career coaching that Selina can offer you, email her at selina@careershifters.org
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