I'm my own boss now...

I'm in an odd kind of space right now. My 2 months of time out have come to an end. This is it. This is where it starts. Life without a 9 to 5, without a daily structure handed to me on a plate.

I'm my own boss. My life is in my hands.

While my friends went back to work on Monday morning, back to scheduled meetings, a list of targets set for them, a strategy planned out for them, a boss to report to, there was nowhere for me to go, noone to report to, noone to tell me what I should be getting on with.

It felt great but it felt odd. Even sitting here now writing this blog I have the strange sensation that I'm bunking off.

Am I really allowed to do this?

I'm sure someone told me that it was impossible. Isn't that why so many of us in our 20s are sitting out jobs feeling frustrated, unfulfilled, drained and resigned because we've been led to believe that's just how it's got to be?

But it is possible. It became possible the moment I took responsibility for my life.

Now 2 months since I left my job not knowing where I was headed, I've created enough funds to keep me going until mid September, I'm being sent to Barcelona for a week's work, Careershifters is getting ready to launch which will give me plenty to sink my teeth into, the Ecologist magazine agreed to take me on as a photographer for a trial period, giving me the opportunity to see how far I can stretch my skills in this field. I'm writing daily and taking on painting seriously - with my first painting in years finished yesterday.

I have to keep pinching myself that I've managed it. I may not know where the next job will come from after Barcelona, but I'm not scared. I know that with commitment, courage and responsibility I can really make this work for me.

And the final piece to put in place? Structure. Creativity without structure is just a mess. Without it the day can slip by.

So I need to create a system that will support me in keeping the ball rolling - making sure I make the calls that I'd rather not make, write even when I have a sudden crisis of confidence, paint when I feel unmotivated.

Structure, organization and systems are not things that come naturally to me, so my next task is to ask advice from the super-organized and explore online to uncover the secrets and joys of self-discipline!