Often
we don't acknowledge, let alone achieve , our dreams because
we prefer to carry on with our heads in the sand, living our "good
enough" day-to-day lives and avoiding the uncomfortable reality of
our own mortality. Somehow there's always another day.
The obituary
exercise forces you to confront reality, and to put in the effort to
express what you want for your life. Writing about yourself in the
third person, objectively and with a long-term view, also helps lend
perspective - casting aside the trivial and bringing the important
stuff to the fore.
As I suspect you probably haven't had much practise at writing obituaries, I've suggested an outline here. I'm an avid obituary reader (sad I know) and have realised that they tend to follow a standard format. Before you start, decide on a time-span; 80 or 90 years is nicely generous.
Obituary outline
1. Your name, with any initials or honours (OBE, anyone?)
2. A one sentence headline summarising your greatest achievement
Here are a couple from today's paper:
"Art historian who rose to become director of the National Gallery and greatly enriched its collection"
"Officer who defied his wounds to man his machine gun in the face of overwhelming odds"
What's most note-worthy about your life to date - what would be your headline if your obituary was written today?
What headline would you like for the 90-year-old you?
Think about what needs to happen in your life for the latter to come true.
3. Professional highlights
Write 3 or 4 short paragraphs, one for each professional achievement that you will be known for. What difference have you made through your work? What did you create, influence, implement, prevent, stop?
4. Early influences
Now write 2 or 3 paragraphs tracing your childhood and early adulthood, starting from birth. What were the main events and how did they influence your later career? If you're stuck on the previous professional highlights section, reflecting on early influences can be very informative. What did you learn from these that you could bring to your work?
5. Career chronology
Continue to briefly outline the chronology of your life, bringing in personal elements. Where did you live? Who did you marry or partner with? Did you have children, and if so how many? What did you do in your later years, after retirement? Include quotes - how would you like the people who knew you best to describe you?
6. Interests and anecdotes
What hobbies or passions added richness to your life? What amusing anecdote illustrates something important about you, that you would like to be remembered by?
So now you have the perfect obituary! Are you on track for living up to it? If not, what needs to change?
